Vol 17 No. 5 June 2012
|In this Issue:|
Two female teachers took a group of students from grades 1, 2 and 3 for a field trip to the Epsom Racecourse. When it was time to take the children to the 'bathroom', it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other.
The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting outside the men's toilet when one of the boys came out and told her that none of them could reach the urinal. Having no choice, she went inside, helped the little boys with their pants, and began hoisting them up one by one, holding on to their 'wee-wees' to direct the flow away from their clothes.
As she lifted one boy up, she couldn't help but notice that he was unusually well endowed. Trying not to show that she was staring the teacher said, 'You must be in Grade 3?
'No ma'am', he replied. 'I'm riding Silver Arrow in the seventh race, but I appreciate your help.'
Positive Attitude + Active Mind = Healthy Body
Council of The Ageing (COTA) Insurance,
Meat Loaf Recipe
During a visit to my doctor, I asked him, "How do you determine whether or not an older person should be put in an old age home?"
"Well," he said, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the person to empty the bathtub."
"Oh, I understand," I said. "A normal person would use the bucket because it is bigger than the spoon or the teacup."
"No" he said. "A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window?"
Being an unhealthy weight impacts on your health in many ways, some of which aren't always immediately obvious. For Grandparents with active grandchildren, it can limit their ability to participate in playtime with their kids. It can also inhibit our ability to sleep comfortably, which can result in tiredness and lack of concentration during the day.
But while most of us acknowledge that being overweight isn't healthy, we probably don't fully appreciate the dangers it represents. Unhealthy eating and a lack of physical activity can lead to an increased risk of developing a chronic disease such as some cancers, type 2 diabetes and heart disease.
Become a Swapper
Seniors Legal and Support Service
The Seniors Legal and Support Service is a community service providing free legal advice and support for seniors 60 years and over, who are experiencing or at risk of experiencing abuse, mistreatment or financial exploitation. The service can provide information, advice and support including –
For further information, please telephone the Seniors Legal and Support Service on 4124 6863.
A lorry driver was driving along on a country road. A sign came up that read "Low Bridge Ahead." Before he realised it, the bridge was directly ahead and he got stuck under it. Cars were backed up for miles. Finally, a police car arrived.
The policeman got out of his car and walked to the lorry's cab and said to the driver, "Got stuck, eh?"
The lorry driver said, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of diesel!"
Keeping Up with Local News!
The "Oracle" (Talking Newspaper) – for print impaired person. News from the Fraser Coast Chronicle is recorded onto CD's by volunteers and posted to clients every Wednesday, courtesy of Australia Post.
If you require any information about this service or know of someone who would benefit 41 23 15 54 Ann-Maree (Project Coordinator)
Coming Events And Date Claimers
2012 "Year of The Farmer" Seniors'Week
|Theme:||"Love of the Land"|
|Length:||Maximum of 16 lines|
|Judges:||Peter Chapman (Chronicle) and Wayne Shearman (ABC radio)|
|Contact:||Ann-Maree 41 22 49 83.|
|Theme:||"Bank Overdraft Hat"|
|Rules:||To be worn while judging.|
Further information available July Shades of Grey
Rodeo, Campdraft, Ute Muster, Hall Display and Childrens Ride
|Date:||Sat 16th June 2012|
|Venue:||Teebar Sports Grounds, Brooweena|
|Time:||Rodeo 10.00am and Campdraft 7.00am|
|Cost:||Adults $10.00, Children $5.00 or Family $25.00|
Conducted by the Teebar Show & Sports Ass Inc.
Afternoon Tea supplied
Lucky Door and Raffle Prize
|Date:||Tuesday 19 June|
|Venue:||Senior Citizens' Centre,
333 Alice Street, Maryborough
|Time:||1.30 pm Afternoon tea supplied|
A group of people with early stage dementia and their carers get together fortnightly for a range of fun and interesting activities, aimed to stimulate brain activity and to help maintain independence.
|Date:||Mon 18 June 2012|
|Venue:||Level 1, 200 Bazaar Street. Maryborough|
|Time:||10am – 12 noon|
Further Info: 41 23 56 11
Be yourself, everyone else is taken.
The Maryborough & District Committee on the Ageing Inc.
Last modified June 2012.